It's been a long time since I've talked to you, old friend! Already halfway through February... and a lot has happened since. I've started listening to MPR (yikes, by my own free will, no less!), I buy my own groceries, and yes, I've even vacuumed the stairs. It was only once, but it was an event, no less.
So it's time for growing up and doing that adult stuff, I guess, and definitely time to wonder what's going on in the world, instead of tuning it out as I've been mostly successful in doing the last couple years.
Elections are on everyone's mind around this time of year. Presidential hopefuls are starting to raise money for their campaigns, which some cynics (and perhaps realists) proclaim is the key to a successful White House bid. It does make sense, though; I see it on my own campus. Elections for Student Body President and Vice President are a couple weeks away, and the success of one candidate will most likely (and regrettably) be determined by the financial ability to print out boxfuls of t-shirts and buttons with fancy, professionally-designed logos, and to have glamour-shot style photos to grace each sign, button and t-shirt.
I know there will be a good fight by each team, but truthfully, it's hard to see the underdogs winning in a popularity race like this.
Anyways, time for Physics.
Friday, February 23, 2007
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
chiller
Okay, so now it's pretty frickin cold out. I get to sport the double-sweatshirt look now... and socks-with-sandals... even in the halls, since apparently administration can't get a clue that we should actually heat the buildings on campus.
I'm serious, I think it's about 45 degrees in my room right now. It sucks.
The last few days have been kind of meh, as far as exciting things go. Same old school stuff. It snowed today a little. I get to see the house I'll be living in next semester tomorrow. (Sorry about the format of that sentence, it probably doesn't make much sense, but you'll just have to deal with it. Yep.) Lin Alg test was moved back to Friday, so now I really should be studying for it. But it's hard to study for something when you don't know what to study.
I need to kick myself out of this out-of-it mood. Tomorrow's going to be a lot of running around, which I'm not looking forward to. But it's necessary.
This weekend should be fun, though :) Friday the 13th!!! I'm excited for the pizza party and scary movies... I haven't watched a scary movie in forever... it's a good thing we're going to be watching them at like 7, instead of the middle of the night. I'm such a wimp sometimes. ;)
Take care of yourself. Relax a little. Re-examine your life right now... is it the life you want to be living? Or are you too tired, too rushed to even realize that you're driving yourself into the ground? I spent two years here pushing myself to defy time, but it didn't get me anywhere. In the words of Citizen Cope... let the drummer kick. Trust me.
Goodnight, stinky town.
I'm serious, I think it's about 45 degrees in my room right now. It sucks.
The last few days have been kind of meh, as far as exciting things go. Same old school stuff. It snowed today a little. I get to see the house I'll be living in next semester tomorrow. (Sorry about the format of that sentence, it probably doesn't make much sense, but you'll just have to deal with it. Yep.) Lin Alg test was moved back to Friday, so now I really should be studying for it. But it's hard to study for something when you don't know what to study.
I need to kick myself out of this out-of-it mood. Tomorrow's going to be a lot of running around, which I'm not looking forward to. But it's necessary.
This weekend should be fun, though :) Friday the 13th!!! I'm excited for the pizza party and scary movies... I haven't watched a scary movie in forever... it's a good thing we're going to be watching them at like 7, instead of the middle of the night. I'm such a wimp sometimes. ;)
Take care of yourself. Relax a little. Re-examine your life right now... is it the life you want to be living? Or are you too tired, too rushed to even realize that you're driving yourself into the ground? I spent two years here pushing myself to defy time, but it didn't get me anywhere. In the words of Citizen Cope... let the drummer kick. Trust me.
Goodnight, stinky town.
Sunday, October 08, 2006
autumn rolls around
It's officially fall in stinky town. The sugar beets litter the road, our steam-heating system has fired up and has started spewing rotten marsh smells all over campus, and the refreshing winds of change have blown down most of the leaves from the orange-tinted trees.
I'm happy with it. Truthfully, if I don't have to run another meet in 80 degree weather, I'll be grateful for this cooler weather. Just don't bring in the arctic air for a few more weeks, please.
Anything new? Homecoming 2006 has come and gone. At least I don't have a bunch of extra things to worry about, now that it's over. And I'm finally done with my neuroscience midterm, and a 98% at that! Pretty excited. Although the fact that it was a take-home exam did make quite a bit of difference... after about 6 cumulative hours of working on it. Bleh.
Time to put away clean laundry and hit the hay. Goodnight :)
I'm happy with it. Truthfully, if I don't have to run another meet in 80 degree weather, I'll be grateful for this cooler weather. Just don't bring in the arctic air for a few more weeks, please.
Anything new? Homecoming 2006 has come and gone. At least I don't have a bunch of extra things to worry about, now that it's over. And I'm finally done with my neuroscience midterm, and a 98% at that! Pretty excited. Although the fact that it was a take-home exam did make quite a bit of difference... after about 6 cumulative hours of working on it. Bleh.
Time to put away clean laundry and hit the hay. Goodnight :)
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
satisfaction
Mmmm... good 3 day-old dining center cookies, cold from the fridge... while I sit, relaxing after a long day, stretching out my socked-and-sandaled toes (yes, flip-flops and white ankle socks, they're such a good fashion combination for the season)...
Yes, it's true. Nothing could be better.
My parents are coming soon for family weekend!! And my first traveling meet... ooh, I'm kind of nervous. It'll be fun, and it's probably good that it's a down-and-back instead of an overnight trip for my very first. I was looking forward to the 6k, but I think I'll be okay with rockin the 5. Not too entirely distraught.
The weekend is sure going to be busy. Homecoming parade, football game, hockey game (well... just kidding. I guess I missed out on tickets for that one...), homecoming dance (woo yeah!), and being with mom and dad :) It's going to be good.
Life as of now? Busy. But not so much that I want to cry, so that's good. School hasn't been too hard on me. Extracurrics are kind of kicking me, and I could be doing a better job with those. I wish I had more time to apply for a real job... cause I need to do that eventually. Working at Altru in the ER would be pretty awesome. I finally have a house that I might/probably will be moving into this December!! My favorite cousin is finally getting married (after, like, 7 years or something crazy) to his amazing girlfriend, so that's rocking my world as of late. And... well, love life up here has been developing into something pretty great, so I'm excited about that too :) Cross is good, the workouts have been tiring, my muscles ache like crazy and there's absolutely nothing I can do to get these dang knots out of my calves and quads... but the girls are encouraging and the team is a lot of fun.
Time for some pretty satisfying sleep... and then a nice early morning run, perhaps. Have a great night, world :)
Yes, it's true. Nothing could be better.
My parents are coming soon for family weekend!! And my first traveling meet... ooh, I'm kind of nervous. It'll be fun, and it's probably good that it's a down-and-back instead of an overnight trip for my very first. I was looking forward to the 6k, but I think I'll be okay with rockin the 5. Not too entirely distraught.
The weekend is sure going to be busy. Homecoming parade, football game, hockey game (well... just kidding. I guess I missed out on tickets for that one...), homecoming dance (woo yeah!), and being with mom and dad :) It's going to be good.
Life as of now? Busy. But not so much that I want to cry, so that's good. School hasn't been too hard on me. Extracurrics are kind of kicking me, and I could be doing a better job with those. I wish I had more time to apply for a real job... cause I need to do that eventually. Working at Altru in the ER would be pretty awesome. I finally have a house that I might/probably will be moving into this December!! My favorite cousin is finally getting married (after, like, 7 years or something crazy) to his amazing girlfriend, so that's rocking my world as of late. And... well, love life up here has been developing into something pretty great, so I'm excited about that too :) Cross is good, the workouts have been tiring, my muscles ache like crazy and there's absolutely nothing I can do to get these dang knots out of my calves and quads... but the girls are encouraging and the team is a lot of fun.
Time for some pretty satisfying sleep... and then a nice early morning run, perhaps. Have a great night, world :)
Saturday, September 23, 2006
it's silly
I don't even really know what to post about. But I wanted to, so here I am.
I should be sleeping, since I have to work concessions tomorrow for the football game. We'll see how that goes... I'm supposed to have 7 other people working with me, and so far I have myself, and one of my friends. I guess I'm just not that convincing. Oooh, and we're supposed to do a tempo run tomorrow too, something like 5 miles at 80% race pace. Bleh.
I miss my family.
But this year is definitely going well so far. I like my classes, cross country is amazing, and I'm getting started on this whole making-meaningful-relationships thing. I think I've found someone who truly likes and cares about me... and I like him a lot too :) Life is good.
Oh, so anyway. I went shopping again and bought a new pair of jeans, a couple sweaters, and a tank. Winter is on its way... at least, it's felt that way the last week here. I hate this rainy, chilled-to-the-bone-soaked weather. Bring on a couple more weeks of 70s, please, God? Then all will be good, until January, when nothing can make -40 feel anything less than it is.
Good night, world, I'll catch up with you in the morning :)
I should be sleeping, since I have to work concessions tomorrow for the football game. We'll see how that goes... I'm supposed to have 7 other people working with me, and so far I have myself, and one of my friends. I guess I'm just not that convincing. Oooh, and we're supposed to do a tempo run tomorrow too, something like 5 miles at 80% race pace. Bleh.
I miss my family.
But this year is definitely going well so far. I like my classes, cross country is amazing, and I'm getting started on this whole making-meaningful-relationships thing. I think I've found someone who truly likes and cares about me... and I like him a lot too :) Life is good.
Oh, so anyway. I went shopping again and bought a new pair of jeans, a couple sweaters, and a tank. Winter is on its way... at least, it's felt that way the last week here. I hate this rainy, chilled-to-the-bone-soaked weather. Bring on a couple more weeks of 70s, please, God? Then all will be good, until January, when nothing can make -40 feel anything less than it is.
Good night, world, I'll catch up with you in the morning :)
Sunday, September 17, 2006
i hate sundays in grand forks
Seriously, there is not a single thing open before noon in this place. The city leaders of the area can rest in the comfort of knowing that all the good girls and boys of UND are encouraged to go to church with this legislation, but in the meantime, my stomach is eating itself.
I guess things could be worse, though.
I realized that I've tripped over the same crack in the sidewalk on all of my walks/runs over to Bek Fitness. Right in front of Univ. Ave. I'm cool.
Today I'm actually going to get down to some serious studying. It's going to be awesome.
What I'm hoping for this week:
Good workouts and the ability to perform my best... and maybe getting to go along to the Griak?
No more twisted ankles. It still kind of hurts from last week.
Getting to know myself and my friends better each day.
Being able to understand what's going on in my Neuro class.
Being able to stay awake through the meaningless crap of Genetics (well, at least that's what it seems like so far).
Having the opportunity to just sit down and read for fun sometime.
The hunger pains are getting to me. I better stop writing, otherwise you might get the idea that I'm pissed off all the time. It's just the (lack of) food speaking; I'm actually in a really good mood besides that. More later :)
I guess things could be worse, though.
I realized that I've tripped over the same crack in the sidewalk on all of my walks/runs over to Bek Fitness. Right in front of Univ. Ave. I'm cool.
Today I'm actually going to get down to some serious studying. It's going to be awesome.
What I'm hoping for this week:
Good workouts and the ability to perform my best... and maybe getting to go along to the Griak?
No more twisted ankles. It still kind of hurts from last week.
Getting to know myself and my friends better each day.
Being able to understand what's going on in my Neuro class.
Being able to stay awake through the meaningless crap of Genetics (well, at least that's what it seems like so far).
Having the opportunity to just sit down and read for fun sometime.
The hunger pains are getting to me. I better stop writing, otherwise you might get the idea that I'm pissed off all the time. It's just the (lack of) food speaking; I'm actually in a really good mood besides that. More later :)
Thursday, September 14, 2006
significant
Life has been good.
Apart from the fact that I accidentally erased all the music from my iPod when I connected it with the new laptop... and the fact that I can't get my old comp to stay alive for long enough to download my music library back onto the iPod. Damn technology. I should have never let myself grow dependent on it.
Oh, but it's such a good addiction.
More updates later. Breakfast now.
Apart from the fact that I accidentally erased all the music from my iPod when I connected it with the new laptop... and the fact that I can't get my old comp to stay alive for long enough to download my music library back onto the iPod. Damn technology. I should have never let myself grow dependent on it.
Oh, but it's such a good addiction.
More updates later. Breakfast now.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
more than just whelmed
Gross, I just sneezed on myself. I'm probably getting sick. It's not a surprise. Sharing food at dinner, working out like crazy, running under the heat of the midday sun, not drinking enough water, eating loads of crappy food all day long as I try to appease this hunger... at least I'm getting enough sleep.
Mmm, hunger. It's such a good word to describe everything that's been going on. What am I missing in my life? God? Satisfaction? My family? Maybe all that. But I feel like I've been trying to fill that empty space with a whole lot of stuff that I'm maybe not intending to.
I want to be on the team. I want to practice, run, have fun with the team, all that stuff. Do I want to compete, though? Am I ready for the sacrifices I'll have to take to be up there with the rest of the team?
I went shopping again, like I did last week... it's expensive being single. You actually have to worry about what you look like ;) Not that I really do much about it anyway. But, yes, it was fun spending about $100 on new running clothes (more than I can say about the $91 I spent on a USED Lin Alg textbook).
The new laptop is fantastic. I can probably even sleep while it's still on and running. And it's shiny :)
Well, that's enough of an update for now. Keep your head on your shoulders, and try looking for mine if you get the chance.
Mmm, hunger. It's such a good word to describe everything that's been going on. What am I missing in my life? God? Satisfaction? My family? Maybe all that. But I feel like I've been trying to fill that empty space with a whole lot of stuff that I'm maybe not intending to.
I want to be on the team. I want to practice, run, have fun with the team, all that stuff. Do I want to compete, though? Am I ready for the sacrifices I'll have to take to be up there with the rest of the team?
I went shopping again, like I did last week... it's expensive being single. You actually have to worry about what you look like ;) Not that I really do much about it anyway. But, yes, it was fun spending about $100 on new running clothes (more than I can say about the $91 I spent on a USED Lin Alg textbook).
The new laptop is fantastic. I can probably even sleep while it's still on and running. And it's shiny :)
Well, that's enough of an update for now. Keep your head on your shoulders, and try looking for mine if you get the chance.
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
prayer
God, give me the strength to run my heart out,
Give me courage to stand up for what I believe in,
Give me foresight to choose my words carefully, so that I don't end up looking like a dumb-ass when I say something I shouldn't have,
Empower me with the will to accomplish my goals,
And teach me to enjoy every moment of this life, even through times where I fail at every one of these things.
Give me courage to stand up for what I believe in,
Give me foresight to choose my words carefully, so that I don't end up looking like a dumb-ass when I say something I shouldn't have,
Empower me with the will to accomplish my goals,
And teach me to enjoy every moment of this life, even through times where I fail at every one of these things.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Sunday, August 20, 2006
the single life
So it's officially over.
My heart feels a lot like my body looks right now, except the scratches, bruises, and burns are the result of acting like a kid with all of these opening weekend events. The heart is a different story.
I'm going to try to be a lot more realistic this year. No more wishing for perfect endings or perfect beginnings. Taking time to realize when I'm asking too much of others. And letting go... allowing my self expectations to come to a more realistic level as well.
I'm tired.
I'm so damn tired.
I would talk about my frustrations with HOT stuff, but I frankly don't care anymore.
I think I've stopped crying, but there's no way of knowing for sure. I mean... seriously. I lost it in the middle of calling a friend for help with tomorrow's Honors stuff.
Moral of the story: I need something, someone, somewhere that will be constant in my life. Somehow though, I know that I better not find it any time soon.
Welcome to the single life. May it be a change from all that has been before.
My heart feels a lot like my body looks right now, except the scratches, bruises, and burns are the result of acting like a kid with all of these opening weekend events. The heart is a different story.
I'm going to try to be a lot more realistic this year. No more wishing for perfect endings or perfect beginnings. Taking time to realize when I'm asking too much of others. And letting go... allowing my self expectations to come to a more realistic level as well.
I'm tired.
I'm so damn tired.
I would talk about my frustrations with HOT stuff, but I frankly don't care anymore.
I think I've stopped crying, but there's no way of knowing for sure. I mean... seriously. I lost it in the middle of calling a friend for help with tomorrow's Honors stuff.
Moral of the story: I need something, someone, somewhere that will be constant in my life. Somehow though, I know that I better not find it any time soon.
Welcome to the single life. May it be a change from all that has been before.
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
disconnected phone
Tears in my eyes, but I'm not crying. I'm kind of feeling depressed, but I'm not that sad. Amazing how a conversation can bring things flying in front of your face.
My two best friends at college are both having a wonderful time with the dating world. I'm the one without a clue.
I'm pushy, unyielding, and assumptive. I'm fully half at fault for this falling-out. I know that.
I wish there was more, so much more...
Where did the time go/When everything was simple and free/I wanna know what happened/somebody woke me before I could have my American dream
BTE
My two best friends at college are both having a wonderful time with the dating world. I'm the one without a clue.
I'm pushy, unyielding, and assumptive. I'm fully half at fault for this falling-out. I know that.
I wish there was more, so much more...
Where did the time go/When everything was simple and free/I wanna know what happened/somebody woke me before I could have my American dream
BTE
Sunday, August 06, 2006
whoa nelly
Wow, it's been a long time since I've written. What has happened in the meantime...?
Life is feeling, well, different as of late.
And I don't know how to explain it. I like it, though. It feels like I'm in control. But am I? Here I am, sitting with my laptop at 2:17 in the morning, when maybe I should be getting some sleep for once. Thursday night, I get a little over 2 hours of sleep. Yesterday, I stay up until... 3? Or something like that. So I guess I'm still good to go for another hour, for continuity's sake.
Okay, so how has my life changed in the past few weeks? I guess I feel a lot more open to change. To coping with emergency. To meeting random people, having a blast, and then throwing it out of my mind because I'll never see them again. Or at least, for a very long time.
But I don't want to have to do that. I wish I could see my Canadian relatives more than once every 5 years. I wish I could make lasting relationships that hold true through distance and time. But it never really works out.
...
Oh, by the way, my cousin Aaron has a book out right now (he did all the illustrations!!) and it's called "Impatient Pamela Learns About Germs." Exciting!! Buy it, and you can tell everyone you know the illustrator's cousin ;)
Time to go to bed. Hasta la vista (que espero que seria pronto), y mi amor.
Life is feeling, well, different as of late.
And I don't know how to explain it. I like it, though. It feels like I'm in control. But am I? Here I am, sitting with my laptop at 2:17 in the morning, when maybe I should be getting some sleep for once. Thursday night, I get a little over 2 hours of sleep. Yesterday, I stay up until... 3? Or something like that. So I guess I'm still good to go for another hour, for continuity's sake.
Okay, so how has my life changed in the past few weeks? I guess I feel a lot more open to change. To coping with emergency. To meeting random people, having a blast, and then throwing it out of my mind because I'll never see them again. Or at least, for a very long time.
But I don't want to have to do that. I wish I could see my Canadian relatives more than once every 5 years. I wish I could make lasting relationships that hold true through distance and time. But it never really works out.
...
Oh, by the way, my cousin Aaron has a book out right now (he did all the illustrations!!) and it's called "Impatient Pamela Learns About Germs." Exciting!! Buy it, and you can tell everyone you know the illustrator's cousin ;)
Time to go to bed. Hasta la vista (que espero que seria pronto), y mi amor.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
no te preocupes
It's been a long.... long week. I'm not in the mood to go in depth on it.
Maybe I'm listening to too much music; too much philosophy getting drilled into my head via catchy melodies while I spend hours in the culture room changing media or counting cells in the hemocytometer. Good stuff.
I found out that I had completely forgotten about a dentist appointment this morning, and I completely broke down crying for no real reason.
It's just that kind of week.
Maybe I'm crazy,
Maybe you're crazy,
Maybe we're crazy,
Probably.
- Gnarls Barkley
Maybe I'm listening to too much music; too much philosophy getting drilled into my head via catchy melodies while I spend hours in the culture room changing media or counting cells in the hemocytometer. Good stuff.
I found out that I had completely forgotten about a dentist appointment this morning, and I completely broke down crying for no real reason.
It's just that kind of week.
Maybe I'm crazy,
Maybe you're crazy,
Maybe we're crazy,
Probably.
- Gnarls Barkley
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
just plain
It's been a long week. And it's only Tuesday. Not good.
Life is busy, and I haven't been paying attention to this thing as I should, well, neither have I been paying attention to myself. What have you been paying attention to, girl? I don't know, maybe this stupid 6-credit class I'm paying out of the ass for, full time researching at Mayo... as well as trying to find somewhere where I fit in. All in all, I'm just plain tired of it. Tired of...
Coming in to work and finding that my results are totally worthless, because some element of my experiment design is wrong or is based on an incorrect assumption...
Being the outsider.
Trying to stay awake for a four-hour-long class after working for 8 hours, taking notes on stuff I probably already know...
Not being jock enough, and then being considered not enough of a girl.
Waking up every morning at 6:30.
Wanting something more out of life, but never quite reaching it.
Missing my friends abroad...
And... having my brain short out late at night. Time to end this message, I guess. Goodnight, farewell, good luck, and auf weidersehen :)
Life is busy, and I haven't been paying attention to this thing as I should, well, neither have I been paying attention to myself. What have you been paying attention to, girl? I don't know, maybe this stupid 6-credit class I'm paying out of the ass for, full time researching at Mayo... as well as trying to find somewhere where I fit in. All in all, I'm just plain tired of it. Tired of...
Coming in to work and finding that my results are totally worthless, because some element of my experiment design is wrong or is based on an incorrect assumption...
Being the outsider.
Trying to stay awake for a four-hour-long class after working for 8 hours, taking notes on stuff I probably already know...
Not being jock enough, and then being considered not enough of a girl.
Waking up every morning at 6:30.
Wanting something more out of life, but never quite reaching it.
Missing my friends abroad...
And... having my brain short out late at night. Time to end this message, I guess. Goodnight, farewell, good luck, and auf weidersehen :)
Saturday, May 27, 2006
late nights, long naps
Time to get to bed, but it's been too long to put off this post.
It's back to work for Jessica; I did orientation this Wednesday and I've spent the last three days trying to get a handle on what is going on in the lab, at least, my part of the lab. I think I need to just stop looking at computer screens (wow, another good reason I should go to bed instead of writing this, yet my undying passion to blog wins out) because I think my eyes are being burned out of my skull.
Umm... what else? Life is kind of boring, but tomorrow I get a chance to get out on the lake with my aunt and uncle. And maybe next weekend, friends will come down to visit!! Actually, I don't know that, but it's an open invitation to come and enjoy all that SE MN has to offer ;)
Oh, and Patty is going to be in town tomorrow! Yay for that!!
Emily is in Croatia, Jess in Kazahkstan... it'll be kinda lonely around here...
But at least I can hang out with my mom and dad :) And Neer, Dylan, and Arun, and Josiah, of course.
And I've read more than I did the entire year in the last week... that is, reading things that I wanted to read, instead of textbooks. I'm through Deception Point and The Da Vinci Code, and I'm almost through Stiff. I almost started reading The Road Ahead by Bill Gates, only that I stopped myself and realized it was written in 1995, and that it was pretty much pointless reading about potential new developments 11 years later. And that it was really boring. I literally fell asleep trying to read the intro... although I tend to do that a lot lately. Something about staying up late and then forcing myself to sleep after work.
At least it's a three-day weekend.
It's back to work for Jessica; I did orientation this Wednesday and I've spent the last three days trying to get a handle on what is going on in the lab, at least, my part of the lab. I think I need to just stop looking at computer screens (wow, another good reason I should go to bed instead of writing this, yet my undying passion to blog wins out) because I think my eyes are being burned out of my skull.
Umm... what else? Life is kind of boring, but tomorrow I get a chance to get out on the lake with my aunt and uncle. And maybe next weekend, friends will come down to visit!! Actually, I don't know that, but it's an open invitation to come and enjoy all that SE MN has to offer ;)
Oh, and Patty is going to be in town tomorrow! Yay for that!!
Emily is in Croatia, Jess in Kazahkstan... it'll be kinda lonely around here...
But at least I can hang out with my mom and dad :) And Neer, Dylan, and Arun, and Josiah, of course.
And I've read more than I did the entire year in the last week... that is, reading things that I wanted to read, instead of textbooks. I'm through Deception Point and The Da Vinci Code, and I'm almost through Stiff. I almost started reading The Road Ahead by Bill Gates, only that I stopped myself and realized it was written in 1995, and that it was pretty much pointless reading about potential new developments 11 years later. And that it was really boring. I literally fell asleep trying to read the intro... although I tend to do that a lot lately. Something about staying up late and then forcing myself to sleep after work.
At least it's a three-day weekend.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
no introduction needed
I'M DONE!!!!!
And that's all I have to say about that. Just kidding. Am I ever at a lack for words?
OChem final was surprisingly manageable, or so I believe. And, ahh... DPsych, the class I studied maybe 2 hours in advance for, was cake. Mmm... talking about cake... (as I gaze lovingly at the cookie pizza my sister bought me for my birthday) Honors 293 portfolio is turned in, Spanish final paper is in my prof's mailbox, and the OChem lab exam was royally rocked by my excellent chemistry laboratory capabilities :) Except for the structure of hydrobenzoin; kind of forgot about that. But the rest was a cinch.
Now I'm done. Time to start thinking about what to do with all this free time... pack? make a delicious lunch for my compadres tomorrow? sleep? Ah, or choice D... all of the above!
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
getting there
I can't wait for this all to be over with...
Seems like everything lately has been tainted by something. I don't know what it is. It's impatience. It's misunderstanding. Guilt, grief, other crap, spite, I don't know. No se. So I repeat myself.
May Day has come and gone with less of a flourish than I hoped... I still have 8 may baskets sitting around my computer. Remember the times when kids ran from neighbor's house to the next delivering baskets, in hopes that they could deliver all of them without getting "caught" by the kids they were delivering to? Man, this was the time of year back in the day... just getting off the sugarhigh of Easter, and then having the chance to get hyped on sweets again just a couple weeks later... It's even better than Halloween, because you know you're going to get good stuff in those baskets, whereas... you know, the lady who always gives out ShockTarts and Tootsie Rolls at Halloween? That definitely doesn't happen ;) Actually, those two aren't so bad. It's the Smarties and the Bottlecaps that get me gagging. Or the homemade-looking multicolored taffy candies that may or may not have razorblades and needles in them.
Yeah.
So, time to catch up on a little more meaningless stuff before this hectic weekend. I'll be home in 11 days, and done with finals in 8!!
Seems like everything lately has been tainted by something. I don't know what it is. It's impatience. It's misunderstanding. Guilt, grief, other crap, spite, I don't know. No se. So I repeat myself.
May Day has come and gone with less of a flourish than I hoped... I still have 8 may baskets sitting around my computer. Remember the times when kids ran from neighbor's house to the next delivering baskets, in hopes that they could deliver all of them without getting "caught" by the kids they were delivering to? Man, this was the time of year back in the day... just getting off the sugarhigh of Easter, and then having the chance to get hyped on sweets again just a couple weeks later... It's even better than Halloween, because you know you're going to get good stuff in those baskets, whereas... you know, the lady who always gives out ShockTarts and Tootsie Rolls at Halloween? That definitely doesn't happen ;) Actually, those two aren't so bad. It's the Smarties and the Bottlecaps that get me gagging. Or the homemade-looking multicolored taffy candies that may or may not have razorblades and needles in them.
Yeah.
So, time to catch up on a little more meaningless stuff before this hectic weekend. I'll be home in 11 days, and done with finals in 8!!
Friday, April 28, 2006
don't let life pass you by
Wow. Life has been a whirlwind the last two weeks.
I just finished my last Ochem exam before the final in a week and a half... That is a relief to have done. I still have a big paper to write for my Honors Directions and Dimensions in Healthcare class... I'll be writing about women's reproductive rights and politics... and why there is such a disparity between the rights of women and the rights of men when it comes to reproductive rights, according to the state. I also have ONE MORE paper for Spanish, which shouldn't be too intense, since I've been putting in a lot of work in all my papers all throughout the semester. And, haha, Developmental Psych, but I'm not too worried at all about that. So, basically the one thing that I'll be sweating next week will be the final ACS OChem test.
So... why haven't I posted in a while? I took a day off of school and went down to Mankato Tuesday afternoon for my Grandma Hensel's funeral. What an amazing woman... she spent her entire life caring for others, loving, and being so utterly accepting of absolutely everyone. We were talking about this at her funeral: Who can truly say that they have never said a bad thing about ANYONE their entire life? I remember so clearly waking up on those Thanksgiving and Christmas vacations in her enormous farm house, going with Laura to the kitchen to peek at all the breakfast foods in the porch (mmm... her caramel rolls were to die for!), and there was Grandma, working away at making a pot-full of oatmeal for all the family.
She would just be humming away as we walked into the kitchen, smiling broadly when she turned around to see us rummaging through the pans and tins of goodies on the porch. She would ask us what we wanted for breakfast, and then after getting that ready, she would run out to the chicken coop and the garden to take care of chores. Her kitchen always smelled of warm, rich aromas mixed with the freshness of cool, washed vegetables and the smell of dew on the grass through the window over the sink. The rest of the house always smelled musty, but we all knew why that was; Catherine worked so hard in the kitchen that there was rarely a moment that she sat and rested at my grandfather's side. She lived for her family, and she lived for her husband. Most of all, though, she lived for the Lord and believed in him so much that she failed to believe that there could be a truly bad soul in the world.
My grandma Catherine Hensel 1910-2006
Caring, joyful, devoted, compassionate, beautiful, visionary, loving, humming, giving, grandma, mother, wife, sister, and great-grandma. She gave us life; she gave us the world.
I just finished my last Ochem exam before the final in a week and a half... That is a relief to have done. I still have a big paper to write for my Honors Directions and Dimensions in Healthcare class... I'll be writing about women's reproductive rights and politics... and why there is such a disparity between the rights of women and the rights of men when it comes to reproductive rights, according to the state. I also have ONE MORE paper for Spanish, which shouldn't be too intense, since I've been putting in a lot of work in all my papers all throughout the semester. And, haha, Developmental Psych, but I'm not too worried at all about that. So, basically the one thing that I'll be sweating next week will be the final ACS OChem test.
So... why haven't I posted in a while? I took a day off of school and went down to Mankato Tuesday afternoon for my Grandma Hensel's funeral. What an amazing woman... she spent her entire life caring for others, loving, and being so utterly accepting of absolutely everyone. We were talking about this at her funeral: Who can truly say that they have never said a bad thing about ANYONE their entire life? I remember so clearly waking up on those Thanksgiving and Christmas vacations in her enormous farm house, going with Laura to the kitchen to peek at all the breakfast foods in the porch (mmm... her caramel rolls were to die for!), and there was Grandma, working away at making a pot-full of oatmeal for all the family.
She would just be humming away as we walked into the kitchen, smiling broadly when she turned around to see us rummaging through the pans and tins of goodies on the porch. She would ask us what we wanted for breakfast, and then after getting that ready, she would run out to the chicken coop and the garden to take care of chores. Her kitchen always smelled of warm, rich aromas mixed with the freshness of cool, washed vegetables and the smell of dew on the grass through the window over the sink. The rest of the house always smelled musty, but we all knew why that was; Catherine worked so hard in the kitchen that there was rarely a moment that she sat and rested at my grandfather's side. She lived for her family, and she lived for her husband. Most of all, though, she lived for the Lord and believed in him so much that she failed to believe that there could be a truly bad soul in the world.
My grandma Catherine Hensel 1910-2006
Caring, joyful, devoted, compassionate, beautiful, visionary, loving, humming, giving, grandma, mother, wife, sister, and great-grandma. She gave us life; she gave us the world.
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
sophomoritis?
Bleh, it's hard to motivate myself to do work right now.
I feel like such a rebel... I'm choosing not to do my DPsych workbook pages, because they are a huge pain in the ass, and even if I don't do the rest of the workbook assignments for the rest of the semester, it's only going to bring me down to a 95%. Honestly. NOT worth the effort.
Oooh, that about perfectly described my pissed-off attitude, as well. I need to figure out whatever is really bothering me, because I have been in a bad mood for too long and it's getting tiring.
I've posted about this once before. But it still seems to bother me: the closer one is to someone, the easier it is to be affected by the little things that person does. If they are in a crappy mood, then I'm going to be affected by it. If they don't make time for me, then I take it as they don't want to be around me. I'm hurt by the fact that they have homework, friends, and obligations just like me, but I don't see how the double standard I'm employing is unfair.
I hate being dependent on other people, especially when it comes to my own emotions.
But why is it that I get that way? Why do I take my own failures so seriously and use them against other people? It shouldn't be my friends' faults that I fill my life with so much extra stuff. It shouldn't be their fault for my inability to separate my evaluation of myself as a person from the successes or failures of my organizations, events, etc.
I just need to let it go.
And cry.
I feel like such a rebel... I'm choosing not to do my DPsych workbook pages, because they are a huge pain in the ass, and even if I don't do the rest of the workbook assignments for the rest of the semester, it's only going to bring me down to a 95%. Honestly. NOT worth the effort.
Oooh, that about perfectly described my pissed-off attitude, as well. I need to figure out whatever is really bothering me, because I have been in a bad mood for too long and it's getting tiring.
I've posted about this once before. But it still seems to bother me: the closer one is to someone, the easier it is to be affected by the little things that person does. If they are in a crappy mood, then I'm going to be affected by it. If they don't make time for me, then I take it as they don't want to be around me. I'm hurt by the fact that they have homework, friends, and obligations just like me, but I don't see how the double standard I'm employing is unfair.
I hate being dependent on other people, especially when it comes to my own emotions.
But why is it that I get that way? Why do I take my own failures so seriously and use them against other people? It shouldn't be my friends' faults that I fill my life with so much extra stuff. It shouldn't be their fault for my inability to separate my evaluation of myself as a person from the successes or failures of my organizations, events, etc.
I just need to let it go.
And cry.
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