new something

I should be sleeping or maybe even cleaning up my house after all this new year's partying. Instead, I'm kept awake by the fact that I haven't updated this thing in a few days. I shouldn't even care, but I still do it, for my own sake. I feel as if I'm letting part of me slip away, and if I don't sit back and look at what I've been doing, maybe I'll lose it forever.

A large part of it is that it's getting to be that time of break where I just want to head back and start the next semester, no matter how boring Grand Forks is. It's not like I don't enjoy being home. I just want to get going on something that actually matters, like studying, getting back to tutoring, setting up programs for res hall stuff... The more time I spend sitting here, the more I go on facebook and wonder why everyone else isn't as bored as I am. That's tough. Please, just tape a big "L" to my head and make me go to sleep.

I drove one of my good friends to a party after my own got done, so now I sit here, knowing full well he's getting drunk somewhere else. Should I feel left out? Should I want to be included in all this partying? The truth is, it's just not appealing to me any more. Maybe I'm just tired, but I'd be perfectly happy reading the rest of Fountainhead instead of going off to some party. Which is maybe what I'll do for the next hour or so... Or maybe I should just go to bed.

I'm so tired of trying to be correct.

May the New Year bring realization instead of hangovers and headaches, and personal revitalization in a time of drab crappiness. Happy 2006.